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Don't forget to be happy

Be happy in real life

I've just had a great conversation with an ex colleague about social media. About its benefits (we were catching each other up on mutual acquaintances and what they are up to). About its issues (we have all seen hurtful exchanges). About its power and algorithms. About how what we see can shape our thoughts and beliefs about our lives and the lives of our friends. How it can seem that others have perfect careers, families, relationships.

We've all been there. Scrolling through social media feeds and feeling 'how come everyone has their life sorted?'. We may even have been guilty of being selective about which bits of our lives we share, with the intent of appearing to have it all under control.

But underneath, nobody's life is perfect.

Many women tell me that actually they are frustrated with how their career hasn't moved on since having children. That it's hard work doing all that juggling, while feeling overlooked and unheard. And they wonder how it happened that the bulk of the caring responsibilities still falls to them, despite still working full time. Yet, on the surface, we wouldn't necessarily see that in their lives.

So what would make us happy in real life? It's a simple question but not that simple to answer, I've found. In fact, to answer it often takes a long time.

A good place to start is a simple exercise of looking back at your happiest times - both inside and outside of work. What did those times have in common? Was it socialising and having a strong network of support? Was it working in a close team? Was it a job that had purpose? How much does your current situation share with that time?

What would it take to get back to feeling that way?

If you aren't living the life you had hoped for, I may be able to help. Because it is never too late to become what you might have been.

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